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So, you want to have an orgy all by yourself

Are you single? Well, don't jump into the pits of despair quite yet! There is a new craze going around called the 'singletons orgy' - and as you guessed it, there's only one player required. Yes! You! Single you can participate in an orgy... by yourself.

Step 1: Light a candle

Step 2: Turn off the lights.
Side note: make sure to light a candle first... or nice dim LED lighting as so you don't trip when you side your ass down.

Step 3: Find a nice, clean floor to sit criss cross apple sauce on. Ensure that the area of the floor you choose to sit in is clean prior to turning down the lighting.

Step 4: Pull out your favorite thing.

Step 5: Close your eyes

Step 6: Slowly, in a hushed sexy voice, start singing to yourself. If you need some inspirations, try this tune:

"So loved... I'm so loved. Oh so loved and sweet pumpkin kind of sensation of warmth and... love... Oh... Oh... Oh... Love. Oh... Oh... Oh... Love. Sweet. slow. real. Yeah. Oh. So. Love. Uh."

Step 7: While proceeding to sing to yourself, start to think about your favorite food. (Mine's potatoes).

Step 8: Open your eyes.

What did you notice? How do you feel now? Many people report a feeling of hunger after completing this self-satisfying orgy.

Congratulations, you have just completed your first single orgy!

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